Tuesday, April 13, 2010
While I welcome the start of summer with open arms and bare legs, after a few months of heat and flies and more flies and heat I'm well and truly over it. That's when I start to look longingly at my jeans sitting on a dusty shelf in the closet and begin to count down the days until I can wear them without melting.
That day has come, and yet mingled with the excitement of Jeans Weather comes the despair of realising that Jeans Don't Fit No More After Wine-filled Summer.
Let's face it. Is there anything more depressing than jeans shopping when the reason for said jeans shopping is that your much-loved perfectly good existing jean collection has mysteriously shrunk over summer? Shopping for jeans because one suddenly inherited a zillion dollars and can now happily splash out on $800 denims is most exciting. Shopping for jeans because you woke up one morning a size 8 and simply swim in your size 10 - 12's is simply fabulous, darling,.
Shopping for jeans because your muffin top expanded and someone injected your thighs with fat while you were sleeping SUCKS.
I don't even want to buy nice jeans. These newly fatter bits of me don't deserve nice jeans. They don't even deserve KMart jeans. They are only worth ex 1980's High Pant acid wash numbers fresh from the nearest op shop.
Maybe it's time for a jeans-free winter.